Get Off of the Fence

Thoughts About Judas, Jesus, and Us from Sky Carter

Hey, guys!

So, this morning I felt the Lord lay something heavily on my heart, and just as I shared the story of my dream with you all a couple weeks ago now, I feel very strongly that I need to share this with you all. I'm not sure who, but I feel strongly in my spirit that someone out there needs to hear this. Now I'm nothing close to a preacher and nothing at all of a teacher, so bear with me, kay? I'm just a girl trying her best to be obedient unto her God.

We all know what today is—the Friday before Resurrection Sunday, better known as Good Friday, or even Crucifixion Friday. This is the day 2000+ years ago that the spotless Lamb of God, Jesus Christ, hung on a tree atop a hill and shed His blood for the forgiveness of all our sin. Hallelujah and Amen.

Now, this morning in particular, I wasn't really doing anything in particular, just scrolling through Instagram reels (Addictive, that is.), and I've got the feed pretty well tuned to show mostly Christian content…Short shots of preachers, some awesome praise breaks, etcetera, etcetera. You can probably guess what most of them were focusing on—The Crucifixion of Jesus. So, naturally, because of the input, that's what started turning over in my mind.

I started thinking less of the actual event of the Crucifixion and more of the ones that were involved (see: instrumental) in making it happen; I began pondering over the man who was pivotal in kickstarting the whole affair off. Three guesses who I was thinking of.

If you guessed Judas, you'd be right. We all know Judas. Judas Iscariot, the Betrayer of Jesus, the disciple that sold Him out to the Pharisees for thirty pieces of silver. (Matt. 26:14-15) But what do we ever think of him outside the fact that he was Jesus's Betrayer? Even Scripture makes it clear in multiple places that's who he is/will be, even before the treachery even occurs! (Mark 3:19, Matt. 10:4, John 12:4, and others) None of the Gospels kept it a secret from the very start that Judas had been the one to sell Jesus out. I mean, talk about a major spoiler alert, guys.

And this is the guy I wanna spend a few minutes (or paragraphs, if you wanna be technical about it) talking to you guys about. Because I think a lot of us, myself included until this morning, until God started revealing these things to me, don't give Judas that much thought outside of that he is the Betrayer. Because, hate him or don't, he's a pretty important guy. Both in Scripture and in history, and in order for me to be able to relay what it is that God put on my heart, I feel that we need to understand Judas just a little bit past the Betrayal.

And because Pastor David is really the only preacher I'm routinely exposed to (and sometimes Pastor Robert Morris from Gateway on those hours-long YouTube binges), I've got four points. Hooray, right?

Ready? Here we go:

1. Judas was a fence-rider.

I can say with confidence that when you spend the majority of your life (especially your teen years) riding the fence, it's pretty easy to recognize others who are doing the same. What do I mean by that? To put it as simply as I can, a fence-rider is someone who's got one foot over and one foot behind the line so hard that they look like they're either about to impress you with their exercise squatting ability or they're riding an invisible horse. Judas was doing this so fervently that he must've looked like he was doing the spiritual splits. (That's gotta be a nice image, huh? You're welcome.)

See, I'm not saying this with a spirit of condemnation. Not at all. This was me, too. Especially in my teens. On one foot, I was attending church every Sunday morning, most Sunday evenings, and every Wednesday night. I'd sing, I'd raise my hands, I'd even preached to the youth group (and the entire church on one memorable occasion) for our Five Minutes of Fire line up a few times. When I was in the church, I gave every impression that I was entirely there, but not all of my heart was in it. A little bit of it was, but not all of it. I can't even say the majority of it was, because I had one foot in the world. I was doing things I ought not to be doing in secret, because remember I still had an image to uphold for church times and around my family, messing around with worldly junk on my phone. Sound familiar?

We might not realize it right away, but Judas is doing the same thing. He's one of the disciples (John 12:4 again.) Jesus CHOSE him to be one of His twelve (Luke 6:13&16). Judas saw the miracles, the signs and wonders, and listened to Jesus preach. He had one foot and a little bit of his heart in it. But he had one foot out, and most of his heart was still in the world. Scripture even tells us he was a thief that would steal the offerings from the box the disciples carried with them. (John 12:6) All the while, not knowing that Jesus knew exactly what was happening with him, because not only does Jesus know exactly who's sitting on the fence, just as Judas had, just as I had, and just as some of you have and some of you are, but He walks up and down the fence, beckoning us all to hop off that uncomfortable horrible thing and onto the grass with Him, which leads to my next point:

2. Jesus was nothing like what Judas was expecting at all.

I wish I could take the time to talk about just that right there, how Jesus was nothing like what anyone ever was expecting, but I can't at the moment because God has a specific message to get across to someone here. God permitting…perhaps another time. But I need to hammer down this statement in regard to Judas so we can understand him and why he'd done what he'd done.

To realize the truth of this statement regarding Judas, we have to consider the time period Judas had been born and raised in. At this time in Jewish history, Israel was under the control of Augustus Caesar, of Rome. The Children of Israel have been taxed and are suffering under the Roman’s rule, almost in similarity to what they endured previously in Egypt during those 400 years between Joseph and Moses. Some of the Jews are even turning their backs on their religion and their people and becoming servants of Rome as tax collectors just for the chance of leading somewhat comfortable lives (Ex: Matthew.) in spite of becoming pariahs and traitors to their people. The Israelites are praying for and counting on the arrival of the Messiah to end their suffering—a new King David to drive away the Romans just as David had the Philistines. What is all of Israel expecting? A King. A Warrior. And Judas is no exception to this expectation.

But who is it that comes? A Shepherd (John 10:11) and carpenter (Mark 6:3), riding on a donkey. What king of any respect rides a DONKEY? This one, the Most Important One, did, and Judas missed it because Jesus fit none of his expectations. Can I be real honest for just a moment and say that not even your wildest dreams will perfectly match your expectations? And for some people that's okay. They can roll with it and even find joy in it.

I remember attending church camps as a young kid with a Baptist church, and it's a good memory I hold. I had a lot of fun going, but I'll never forget that very first church camp with Fernwood Assembly (now so named Link Church) and their youth group. The camps at the time (and I have no idea if they still are, fyi) were led by our Pastor David and Pastor Robert Nichols, and that very first day I could not believe the insanity that awaited on this mountainside. You'd think I'd have known this thanks to the loonies in my own youth group, but these guys were CRAZY!

Like, nobody told me a well-loved church sport was to squeeze thirty teenagers in a 10x10 wooden octagon and have them try to send each other to Glory early with a dodgeball.

I was fifteen, and to this day it is still one of my very fondest memories of my teen years. Understand that camp defied every expectation I had because of my upbringing, but also understand that when I decided that I would let go of my expectations and roll with it, I ended up having an absolute blast that year and eagerly awaited every church camp after.

That's what the other eleven disciples did. Jesus was nothing of what they expected either; they'd had the same expectations as Judas, but they made the decision to let go of their expectations and roll with this miracle-working, donkey-riding Nazarene carpenter, because even though Jesus defied their expectations, with Him they rejoiced in the experience…and for them He paved the way to eternal joy that no one could rob from them.

Judas, however, wouldn't let go of his expectations. Because Jesus didn't meet his expectations of what Judas believed the Messiah should be, Judas became disappointed in the Messiah that had arrived. That disappointment led to bitterness. Bitterness took root and grew anger. Anger blossomed into resentment, and that resentment allowed a Serpent to slither up his shoulder and whisper ideas of treachery into his ear. Because Judas was disappointed, bitter, angry, and resentful, Judas listened to the Serpent instead of the Son, and that's where we come to the biggest choice of his life: the choice to betray.

And that's point three, if you're still with me. (Thank you if you still are; apparently, I'm as long winded behind a keyboard as Pastor David is behind the pulpit.)

3. It was all Judas's choice.

Now, hear me out for a second; don't start throwing things yet. Some of you are probably like "Wait a second, the devil made him do that." Listen to me very carefully, the devil didn't make Judas betray Jesus, that was all Judas. I know Luke 22:3 says,

"And the devil entered Judas, called Iscariot, who was one of the twelve."

I'm not saying I don't believe in demonic possession, because yes, that does happen. It's seen clearly in Scripture and in the world, both then and today. Just look at Legion (Mark 5:1-17). Yes, Scripture says "the devil entered Judas," but it doesn't say "The devil overtook Judas," which is what happens when one is demonically possessed. It was Judas who went to the Chief Priests to betray Jesus. It was Judas who took the soldiers to the Garden of Gethsemane to arrest Jesus. Not Satan in Judas, not the devil in possession of Judas. Judas himself. And I'm so certain of that because of how Jesus addressed him when Judas arrived with the soldiers to arrest him in the Garden. Jesus always addressed the demons by name when He would cast them out. He did so with Legion and many others, but in the Garden, this is what He says:

"Judas, do you betray the Son of Man with a kiss?" (Luke 22:48).

He calls Judas by name, his own name, not the devil's or another demon's. That tells me that Judas was in (somewhat) sound mind and body when this choice occurred.

"Why's this so important?" You ask. It's quite simple. If Judas was of sound mind and body (again, somewhat, because there was the devil on his shoulder, influencing him to make this choice.), and done this of his own free will, then there is absolutely no excuse for what he has done. He's got no one to blame for his own poor decision to sin against Jesus but his own self. Listen to me; you're not going to like me for this next statement but that's okay: You can point the blame at anyone you want to; you can make all the excuses you want, but at the end of the day, whether you want to admit it to yourself or not: you've got no one to blame but yourself for the choices you've made. "You don't understand, Sky, my circumstances; it wasn't my fault, I didn't ask for this, it just happened," That may be true; I understand that sometimes things around us that have nothing to do with us render circumstances that we're blindly thrown into. I've been there, I've been in situations that had occurred with no choice from me. Still, that doesn't excuse the choices you made in that situation, and for those choices that have had negative impacts since then you got no one to blame but your own self.

And then there's some of you that are just. Like. Judas.

You walk into a bad situation with the intention of making a bad choice, then turn around and get angry when the consequences of that choice come knocking. I'm sorry, I know I'm not making any friends here with this, but there's no excuse for choosing to go walk through a mud puddle and then turn around and get mad because there's mud on your shoes.

Like I said, I know that Judas had that friendly little Serpent riding on his shoulder, just as some of ya'll might, and that Serpent was feeding off that disappointment and bitterness and anger and resentment, whispering words of treason into Judas' ear as he went along. "Hey now, how's that Messiah working out for ya? Not much of a warrior is he? That must be so disappointing for you, boy I bet that bites. What use is He supposed to be against Rome if He's no warrior? He's not all that useful is He?" And all this is rinsing and repeating in Judas's head, and suddenly he thinks it’s a great idea to pay a visit to the Chief Priests and the Pharisees, and because he's riding the fence, because this Messiah is not the One he expected, and because he's got this root of negative emotions in him that's invited the devil in, he makes his choice and chooses thirty pieces of silver.

I know, I'm no one's favorite favorite person. But I want you to know this. None of this comes from a spirit of condemnation or of hatred, but of love. It's because I love you all that I'm telling you these things, because someone needs to wake up and hear what God is saying to you. And because I love you and we got through the hard stuff, I can now tell you the good news, which is point #4:

4. In spite of it all: the fence-riding, the negative spiral because of expectations, the inexcusable choices made, JESUS STILL LOVED JUDAS WITH ALL HIS HEART, just like with any of you that I've been talking to, Jesus. Still. Loves. You.

There wasn't a day in Judas's life that he was not a beloved and desired son of Christ, and there's not a day in your life that you have not been a beloved and desired child of the Most High. This is the heartbreaking thing about Judas: after his consequences came knocking, and he learns that Jesus has been condemned, he goes back to the chief priests and the Pharisees, and he tries to return the silver to them. But the Pharisees react to him like I think too many of us 'holy Christian' people do: They tell him "What do you want us to do about that? You made your bed, now you gotta lie in it. You'll get no help from us." Heartbroken, disgusted with himself, (Scripture doesn't tell us this but you can probably guess this was pretty close to how Judas was feeling at this point,) Judas throws the silver down and because the chief priests rejected him, he's on a spiral downward. Scripture doesn't say this, but I can imagine Judas holing himself up somewhere, pacing frantic back and forth, having a panic attack because,

"Dear God, what have I done? The chief priests, the religious leaders, the church won't help me."

And Judas believes that there's nowhere he can go, no one he can turn to, because the church has turned their back on him. His friends, the disciples, are angry with him, and the One he wronged won't forgive him. And what happens is this: he believes this so strongly that he goes to a tree, ties a noose, and hangs himself. And he's condemned in death because he received no forgiveness, because he didn't give himself the opportunity to receive it.

And there's someone out there, someone I've been talking to this whole time, and you're lining up right with Judas. You've been riding the fence. You’re clinging on too tightly to expectations that aren't being met. You've made some inexcusable decisions that led you to dark places. I'm here to tell you something today: JESUS STILL LOVES YOU. I don't care what fence you're on or what expectations you have. I don't care what decisions you've made that are inexcusable. What sins you have in your life, what dark pits you've fallen into, how lost you are: let me make something very clear to you: Choices and sins might be inexcusable, just like Judas' were, but that doesn't mean it's unforgivable. Romans 3:22 says,

"For ALL have fallen short of the glory of God,"

There has never been a day in your life you were not loved by God. John 3:16-17 says,

"For God so loved the world He sent His only begotten Son that who so ever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son to condemn the world, but that through Him the world might be saved."

This love that God has for the world, as does this salvation Jesus died for, it includes YOU. It included Judas, but Judas chose to believe against it. You differ from Judas in this way—you still have a choice to make. Will you turn your back and deny it, stuck in thinking that you are undeserving, unforgivable, and join Judas at the hanging tree? Or will you kneel and receive it, and join Jesus at the Cross? He's there, He's waiting, and He loves you so, so very much.

I love you today, tomorrow, and every day after until we share a table in Glory. Come join me at Link Church for our Easter Services this Sunday at the old Clarksville Cinema! We'd love to see you there!